What it means
ناز کشیدن (naz-keshidan) names the second half of a two-person dance. One person performs reluctance, holds back, refuses; the other person coaxes, insists, pulls them in. Naz-keshidan is the act of being the reluctant one in a way that asks to be persuaded. The verb is gentle and faintly affectionate, used between intimates more than strangers.
You see it most clearly with children at dinner, lovers in a fight, and friends invited somewhere they secretly want to go. The English “playing hard to get” is close but too narrow; naz-keshidan is not just romantic.
Compound verb structure
The compound is ناز (naz, coquetry, pampered charm) plus کشیدن (keshidan, to pull, to draw out, to bear). Literally: to pull out one’s naz, to draw the reluctance out and make a show of it. The verb keshidan does heavy work across Persian compounds: درد کشیدن (dard-keshidan, to bear pain), سیگار کشیدن (sigar-keshidan, to smoke). Here it suggests the reluctance is being stretched, displayed, made visible.
Conjugation follows keshidan: present mikesham (I draw it out), past keshidam. The naz piece stays fixed.
Why this pattern exists
In a culture where accepting too eagerly looks greedy and asking for what you want looks crass, naz-keshidan is the workaround. The reluctant party performs hesitation so the giver can perform generosity. Both leave with face intact. It is structurally related to taarof but operates inside intimacy rather than between strangers.
The pattern is most visible with children, who learn naz-keshidan before they can name it. “I don’t want dinner,” said while edging toward the table, is a four-year-old’s first taarof.
Examples
dige naz nakesh, biya berim.
Stop holding out, come on let’s go.
دیگه ناز نکش، بیا بریم.
bacheh-ash kheyli naz mikesheh sar-e ghazaa.
Her kid plays really hard to get at mealtimes.
بچهاش خیلی ناز میکشه سر غذا.
Pair with naz-kardan
Naz-keshidan (to perform reluctance) and naz-kardan (to act coy) often overlap in casual use. The cleanest split: naz-kardan is the playful coyness itself, naz-keshidan is the holding-back that asks to be coaxed. In most sentences either works and Iranians do not police the line.
References
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