What it means
قهر کردن (qahr kardan) means to sulk, to cut off communication with someone, or to give someone the silent treatment. The compound joins قهر (qahr), which derives from Arabic (the root ق-ه-ر, qahara, originally meaning to overpower or dominate), and کردن (kardan), the pure-Persian verb meaning to do. In Persian, qahr has shifted from its original Arabic sense of forceful dominance to the specific social act of emotional withdrawal, refusing to speak or interact with someone after a falling-out. The reverse action, آشتی کردن (âshti kardan), meaning to make up or reconcile, is its natural pair. A near-synonym is قهر بودن (qahr budan), which describes the ongoing state rather than the act of entering it.
How to use it
- با بهترین دوستم قهر کردم. (Bâ behtarin dustam qahr kardam.) “I had a falling-out with my best friend and stopped talking to her.”
- چرا باهام قهری؟ (Cherâ bâhâm qahri?) “Why are you giving me the silent treatment?”
- بچه قهر کرد و رفت تو اتاقش. (Bache qahr kard o raft tu otâghash.) “The child sulked and went to his room.”
- دو هفته قهر بودیم تا آشتی کردیم. (Do hafte qahr budim tâ âshti kardim.) “We weren’t speaking for two weeks until we made up.”
Cultural note
Qahr is a recognized and named social institution in Iranian culture, not merely a mood. Family members, friends, and even neighbors can enter a formal state of qahr that may last days, weeks, or years, with the entire social circle aware of it. The pressure to perform آشتی (âshti, reconciliation) often comes from mutual friends or relatives acting as intermediaries. Children learn the concept early, and the phrase قهر میکنم (qahr mikonam, “I’ll stop talking to you”) is a common childhood threat. The cultural weight of qahr reflects the importance Iranians place on relational harmony and the seriousness with which a breach in that harmony is treated.